Not Ariel... but I need some help!

[emily]

I'm on a Phantom of the Opera site, and I've posted a story called, 'A New Beginning or a Closer End?' Can someone tell me how bad it is? No one on the site is really replying.

*All it takes is a musical genius, a beautiful woman, and a whole lot of mayhem to create the story of, The Phantom of the Opera.

No matter how long time went on, the many citizens of Paris were not able to erase the historical incident from their minds.

Men and women went about their daily lives normally. However, whenever someone would pass the old Opera House, shivers ran up and down their spines. Some stopped and prayed that the ‘Angel of Music’ was gone forever. Others took second glances, but kept walking, hoping that none of the ashes and bad luck would rub off onto them.

Parents began warning their children to stay far away from the Opera House. And many of the children listened. Some of their parents had traumatized their children by saying things such as,
“The Angel sees all you do, if you go near that old run-down place, you’ll hear him. His singing voice, calling to you. But all he really wants is to see the sight of human blood and flesh again.” The children would cry themselves to sleep, having nightmares of a terrible ghost coming to slaughter them.

After a while, parents did not have to tell stories like this. Since the children had passed them onto their friends on their own.

I am here to tell the story of Erik after Christine left. A story you have not heard before. Most know Erik as the Phantom, the Angel of Music, or Opera Ghost. He is known as a ghost, a man and a stalker. Do not be frightened away by these words, for the story I have to tell, is worth reading. The story I have to tell, is of a small boy named Jason. A boy who was quiet, and he
kept everything to himself. His mother told him the stories, as the other mothers did. But Jason was intrigued by these stories, rather than horrified. Was this good, or bad? Will Jason fall into Erik’s trap? Or will he out-smart him and show him kindness and understanding?

**It was a cold day, snow began to fall in Paris as December slowly crept up on the citizens. It was a quiet day, most people were cooped up inside reading a book or sleeping. The only noise that could be heard was the sound of children. Children outside laughing and playing in the new fluffy snow.
"Mommy!" A small voice yelled as a boy ripped her doll from her grasp.
"Tommy took my dolly!" She cried, tears running down her frost bitten cheeks.

Jason was not like other children. When his mother tried to encourage him to join the others, he shook his head and smiled at her.
"Just getting to the good part." He said softly, holding a thick book in his small hands. His mother sighed and rubbed her eyes.
"All of this reading will make your eyes fall out." She joked as Jason became enveloped once more in the pages.

The Hunchback, was one of Jason's favorite books. The plot captivated him. How cruel people could be to someone who was different. Although Jason had some difficulty getting through some chapters, he stuck through it and began to understand more and more as he read.

As the day went on, more children went out to play, and more children went in, to warm their frozen bodies by the crackling fire. Jason stayed inside the whole day, as he did almost everyday. His mother gently took the book from his hands.
"Please Ma ma, just one more chapter." Jason pleaded as his mother closed the book.
"Jason, you know how your father told you reading is good for a growing mind?" She asked, placing the book on a small shelf above the fireplace.
"Yes. That's why..." Jason began, but his mother shook her head.
"Not like this Jason dear! You're going to read all the books and your head will explode!" She giggled. Jason managed a small smile.
"Now, come help me prepare supper." She said taking his hand. Jason smiled and joined his mother in the kitchen.

After dinner was prepared, Jason's father came through the door.
"Quite a storm out there." He shivered removing his scarf from around his neck. Jason's mother nodded and helped him remove his coat.
"Your cheeks are cherry red!" She exclaimed, placing her hand on his frozen cheek. He laughed and kissed her hand.
"You're fireplace warm. Now, what's that magnificent smell?" He said sticking his nose into the air.
"Me and mum made soup!" Jason smiled taking his father to the table.
"Oh wonderful! What kind?" His father asked sitting at the table.
"Carrot, chicken and a warn broth." Jason said placing three bowls on the table, along with three small glasses, and spoons.
"Marvelous!" His father said as soup was poured into his bowl.

The three sat and ate happily, discussing their days and this and that. The family was not a wealthy family, and had many problems with money and family issues. When Jason was 4, he was 11 now, he lost his baby sister to an unknown disease. It was left the family devastated. But also pulled them closer together. Now they were struggling to keep the small house they had. Jason's
father worked as a chimney sweep. And his mother would sometimes clean houses, but was mostly at home.

After they were finished eating, they all washed the dishes together. And they were happy about it. They were content with what they had, that's what kept them together.

"Time for sleep." His mother said tucking him under the thin covers. Jason smiled and sighed lightly.
"Goodnight Ma ma." He said as she kissed his forehead.
"May I please read one more chapter?" He asked with pleading eyes.
"No. You may read more tomorrow darling." She smiled smoothing his covers out. Jason sighed and closed his eyes, recalling the day's events. Behind closed lids he saw fluffy white snow flakes fall and land on the hard ground. He saw the hunchback walk slowly across a vast empty land.

Sleep slowly claimed him, and he drifted off, awaiting the next day's excitement.

[swemer]

Hey... Not bad at all... Only problem is... I want more!

[emily]

Nice to know someone likes it. lol Thanks so much SWEMER!

[emily]

Jason awoke to a loud crash that came from the down stairs. He rubbed his eyes and jumped out of bed. His feet carried him swiftly and quickly down the stairs.
"Mum? Dad?" Jason yelled when he reached the kitchen. No one was there, a bowl had shattered all over the floor. Jason's heart leaped into his throat as he walked toward the broken bowl.
"Mum?" He whispered, kneeling down and picking up a large piece of the bowl. Jason stood and walked toward the front door, where had they gone? His mother wouldn't have left without telling him she was going to work today. Besides, it was Sunday, his mother didn't do cleaning on Sundays. A growing fear began to take over Jason's whole body. He began shaking and his palms were sweating.

It was difficult to open the door, due to all the sweat. When he managed to open the door, there were footprints in to snow. Jason swallowed hard and took a deep breath as he walked out. He didn't care that he had no shoes on, no socks, he wasn't even fully dressed, which was not at all proper to walk out in your unders. But nothing mattered right now, nothing except his mother and father's whereabouts.

Jason followed the footprints down the front steps and out into the street. They went on down the road, until they were taken over by wheel tracks from a carriage. Where had they gone?! Jason began to feel tears form in his eyes. His feet were numb, and the wind whipped against his face.
"Mum... Dad?" Jason whispered, as he stared off into the empty distance.

[powerdroid]

Well, my knowledge of "Phantom" is weak; however, this is an interesting tale. You have a good grasp on telling a tale. It is involving and intriguing.

I await the next installment

[emily]

Just as Jason was about to enter the house, he felt a hand settle on his right shoulder.
"Who's there!?" Jason whipped around to see his mother standing before him.
"Mum...?" He whispered as she hugged him close.
"I'm so sorry Jason dear." She whispered carrying him into the house.

"Where were you?" Jason asked, sipping a glass of warm milk. His mother sighed and rubbed
her eyes. Jason noticed that they were red and puffy. She looked tired and older, she usually
looked so young and beautiful, but now, she looked older and weaker.
"I was... with your father..." She began slowly, trying to fight back tears.
"Isn't dad at work though?" Jason asked setting the glass on the floor. She shook her head, then buried her face in her hands. Jason knew something was terrible wrong. He pried her hands away from her face, exposing her red eyes and tear stained cheeks.
"Where's dad? He's at work... right?" Jason asked quietly. She shook her head and sighed,
taking deep breaths.
"Your father, darling... was on his way to work, and..." She swallowed hard and breathed in
deeply. Jason stared at her, not speaking, he was fearful for what would come next.
"Your father was killed, on his way to work..." She finished, tears spilling from her eyes.

Jason felt like a huge wave of water was crashing over him, drowning him. He felt like nothing
mattered and he was floating.
"Jason, sweetie?" His mother jolted him from his own mind.
"No..." He whispered.
"What darling?" His mother asked quietly.
"No! Dad is still here! Watch, I'll go through the door and he'll be here, for breakfast! And we'll be a family again!" Jason yelled running through the front door and into the road.
"Jason!" His mother yelled after him.
"Dad!! Dad, please come home!!" He yelled into the dark, cold emptiness. His mother took his
shaking body into her arms.
"Sh... Jason, it's alright."
"No... he's still here... he'll be home soon.." Jason began to blank out.
"Rest your head, till the morning light..." She sang to him softly. Before Jason knew it he was
fast asleep.

[emily]

When Jason awoke, he saw his mother hovering over him.
"Mum...?" He whispered. He didn't remember much of what had happened the previous day. His head throbbed and his whole body felt numb.
"Oh, Jason, don't scare me like that! You've slept two days straight! I had to have the doctor come, and he didn't know what to do!" She exclaimed, placing her hand over her heart. Jason blinked. Had he really been sleeping for two days? It felt as if he had been sleeping for a few hours. Maybe even less.

It was late afternoon, and Jason found it difficult to get out of bed. His head killed, and everything seemed loud. As he peered out of the frost covered window, memories of his father rushed back to his cloudy mind. His father was not like most, he was also fascinated by Erik, the Angel of Music. That's the only reason Jason wasn't afraid.

Jason's father had worked in the theater for a few years. During the time of the Ghost. Rather than being frightened by the 'mishaps' he was intrigued, and wished he had paid more attention to the strange happenings. But, time never allowed, he was in a tight schedule, and once the theater burnt and closed, he had to find a new job. And the only one he could find willing to except him was a chimney sweep.

Jason would sit in the tall grass as his father told him stories of the Opera Ghost.
"He was terribly deformed people said. I, don't know for sure, since I have not seen the man in person." His father had said.
"He was said to be insane. Insanely in love, with a woman he could not have." The story captivated Jason, and in a way, reminded him of the Hunchback.

"Jason, dear... are you alright?" Jason snapped back to reality, his father's soft soothing voice still echoing in his head.
"You scared me the past days. Thought I'd lost you too." She whispered, a tear running down her cheek. Jason sighed and rubbed his eyes.
"Do you know why it happened?" Jason asked taking a seat at the table.
"No, that's why it scared me so much. I stayed by your side, praying, and hoping, and praying for you. I love you so much darling, I don't want to lose you... I-I don't know what I'd do with myself." She sighed, beginning to cry more. Jason felt like crying as well, but for some reason felt as if he couldn't. He felt like he now had to take over for his father's absence.

As the days rolled by more snow covered the frosty ground. Ice hung from tree branches and there was a ghostly feeling in the house. Ever since Jason's father had died, Jason and his mother had not spoken more than a few words. They were both afraid to mention him, they didn't know how one another would react.

"Where are you going?" Jason's mother asked as his hand rested gently on the door knob.
"Out..." He said slowly.
"Out, where?" She asked taking his hand off of the knob, but Jason just put it back on.
"Out, away from the house. I've been here for weeks it feels. I just need to go out and clear my head." Jason said opening the door, but his mother closed it.
"Why do you need to clear your head? Jason, you know if you have problems you can always talk..." He cut her off.
"Mum, I know you're here for me, but... I just need to be alone for a little while."
"You have been alone for a while, in your room reading or gazing out the window..." She sighed and let him open the door.
"Be back for dinner." She sighed. Jason hugged her goodbye and walked down the snowy road.
"God, watch over him." She whispered watching him disappear down the road.

Jason walked for a while, he didn't know where he was going, and he didn't care, as long as he got away from the house. He felt like he couldn't live there anymore, since his father died, it felt empty.

As he walked on, he reached the old Opera House. Curiosity began to take over him, his mother's warnings had no frightened him, but his father's stories seemed to linger in his mind.
"The Angel sees.... the Angel knows..." Jason whispered. A well known saying throughout all of Paris. His father had said he never saw the man, so did not if the stories were true. Standing before the monstrous building, Jason began to feel the urge to enter.

Boards kept people out, but Jason could easily get in. Weather had worn them, and they weren't put up well in the first place.

Jason's mind raced, should he go in, or not? One side of him told him to go in, everything would be fine, but, the other side of him, told him that it would be going against if mother's wishes. People had said, if you went in, you didn't come out, and if you did, you ended up like Christine... sad and depressed. She and Raoul moved away, no one knew where to, but everyone knew she was unhappy.

Jason had a different view on why she was so depressed. Maybe she missed the Angel of Music, maybe she thought that she made the wrong decision. But other people thought that he tormented her and maybe even raped her, traumatizing her, and taking advantage of her youth.

As Jason's mind raced with confused thoughts, he finally decided on what to do... he would go in. Maybe the Angel was gone, maybe it was just what it looked like, a broken down building, or... maybe there was more, magic, mystery... and an Angel, waiting...

Could this be a new beginning? Or a closer end...?

[powerdroid]

And no one from the PHANTOM website commented? Their loss.

[emily]

Thanks so much. It's really incouraging. I've been discouraged lately about writing, so, it really does mean a lot to me. Thanks.
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Jason pulled one board from the blocked door, then another, and another. There were a total of seven boards weakly nailed to the wooden door. Jason finally managed to get all of seven boards off. It all felt real now, two more steps and he was in the Angel's lair.

Jason inhaled and walked inside. It was dark, and the smell of mold and dust filled the air. A rat scurried across Jason's feet, and a large spider webs were everywhere. As Jason walked further and further into the dusty old theater he saw a shattered pieces of glass on the floor. And then he stood before the shattered chandelier. His eyes widened in aw as he stared at the monstrous chandelier. He could imagine in his mind how this place must have been before the Phantom.

"Anyone here?" Jason's small voice echoed in the large room. No reply, not that Jason excepted one, but he was hoping. Maybe the Angel was gone, maybe none of this ever happened, maybe his mother and father made it up, just so he wouldn't come here.

Just when he was about to leave and give up, a deep, booming voice replied to his question.
"Be gone! Why are you here? Do you come to make further destruction on the Opera House? Or, are you here to torment me?! Let me die in peace!" Jason stood completely still, and swallowed hard. he was scared to breathe, scared to make any noise. He had not expected a response, though, in a way, he was glad he got one.
"My name is Jason. Who's speaking?" Jason was stunned by how brave he sounded. He heard a chuckle echo through the room, sending chills up and down Jason's spine.
"You do not know who I am? I, am Erik! Angel of Music, a Ghost! The man with the hideous face, the man who struck fear into the souls of millions!" The voice boomed, then, the spine chilling laugh came after.
"So, it's true, there really is, an Angel of Music!" Jason meant to say this to himself, but it slipped through his lips.
"What? Did you not believe in me? Why, I am... why am I talking like this, I'm sure you'd rather see me... in person..." Erik chuckled, then there was silence. Jason felt like running all the way home without stopping, but his feet would not let him move.

Before Jason knew it, a tall dark figure was standing before him.
"Why... you're nothing but a child." Erik said in a dry tone. Jason felt his chest harden and he could not move.
"I-I-I..." Jason stuttered.
"You what?" Erik hissed. He got right into Jason's face, and all Jason smelt was death... whatever death smelled like. It was the smell of rotting flesh, mold, sickness, and fear all mixed into one horrid stench. Jason choked and coughed.
"Something wrong?" Erik chuckled. Fear seemed to completely envelope Jason, and he wished he had never came in here. Erik leaned back and lifted his hood away from his face. A mask covered his whole face, a white mask that covered everything but his lips. Jason didn't bother asking him why he wore a mask, his father had told him that people said he was terribly deformed. Even if Jason didn't know this, he was too afraid to ask.
"Well, why are you here? To stare at me? Here do you wish to see my beautiful face?!" Erik hissed and laughed. Jason shook his head, not able to form words in his mouth.
"No... sir. Please, let me go!" Jason managed to plead. Erik chuckled softly then rested his hand on Jason's shoulder. But it didn't feel like a hand, it felt like bones. Jason shuddered.
"Why must you leave so soon dear boy?" Erik smiled, Jason could see rotting teeth.
"W-Well, I have to go home, for... dinner!" Jason exclaimed. Erik laughed, and grabbed Jason's arm, he held it tight.
"Why don't you join ME for dinner. It's been, so, so lonely..." Erik chuckled and dragged Jason into the darkness. And all Jason thought about was his mother and father. How worried his mother would be, and his father's stories. Never, had Jason imagined the Angel to be like this.


Erik dragged Jason through numerous tunnels. Jason's feet began to ache, and his arm felt numb, since Erik was squeezing it so tight. The only light that lit their path was a lighted torch that Erik held before them. Other than that, they were surrounded by complete darkness.

Tears ran down Jason's cheeks. He wanted to go home to his mother, he was petrified! Never in his wildest dreams had he imagined this happening if he came here. When his father told him stories of the Angel, he pictured him as an older man, a sad looking man. Who was lonely, and just wanted to be loved. This was something very different from Jason's picture. Although Erik seemed old, he had a spunk to him, an evil sort of spunk that scared Jason.

"Almost there." Erik chuckled lightly. Every time Jason heard that laugh he wanted to block his ears. It scared him to death, thinking that he might be here forever. As they walked on, Jason saw things he wished he didn't see. Looped ropes with lifeless skellingtons hanging in the noose. Jason swallowed and began to feel sick to his stomach.
"I'm the lover of trapdoors, and if you don't watch out, I'll get you!" Erik said, but not with a laugh, he sounded cold and evil.

Now the concept of 'If you go in, you won't come out.' began to feel all too real to Jason. He was now fearing for his life.
"Now, be cautious young one. Do not look into the dark water, unless you wish it to be your grave." Erik said dryly, as if he was taking Jason on a tour, and it was just a normal safety precaution. Jason obeyed, he wanted to know why, but he didn't want to find out that way.

Erik walked slowly to the tip of the small boat and it began moving. Jason pulled his knees up to his chest and sighed. He kept telling him self not to cry, for fear of what Erik would do to him. The boat moved on into a large dark room. It was dimly lit with candles scattered in random places.
"Get out." Erik said stepping out of the boat. Jason obeyed and stood behind Erik. He was tall and thin. So tall, Jason had to look up to see into his black piercing eyes.

"I don't eat. But I have food for you." Erik said leading Jason through a door. There was a small table and one chair in the middle of a small room.
"Have a seat... please." Erik said, his voice softened, he sounded more friendly, but not enough to make Jason feel comfortable. Erik walked through another door, and Jason heard a lock click. Now was his time to try and escape! Little did he know, Erik knew what he would try to do.

Jason tip-toed to the door he had entered through, and it slowly creaked open, but Jason did not see what he expected to see. He expected to see a lake, and a bay, with a boat pushed into the sand. But what he saw was another small room, and on the other end another door.

Jason was puzzled. Before he could test out that door he heard a lock click. Jason slammed the door and sat down quickly.
"You're not trying to escape now, are you? Not already?" Erik smirked. Jason gulped and shook his head slowly.
"Good, dinner, is served."
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If this doesn't seem appropriate, then I'll delete the post.