|
Post by josh89 on Mar 13, 2011 23:49:01 GMT -5
=D
|
|
|
Post by daytripper on Mar 20, 2011 21:28:30 GMT -5
okay guys this week has been very chaotic so i cant get a new chapter up tonight i will try and get one up this week though and another one next weekend.
|
|
|
Post by daytripper on Mar 22, 2011 21:21:45 GMT -5
crap i'm really sorry this is taking so long guys and gals, ive got a major case of writers block :(
|
|
|
Post by daytripper on Mar 24, 2011 21:31:03 GMT -5
Chapter 11
Out Of The Sea
Marty swam off to his room somewhat familiar with the layout of the palace by now. He swam in and thought to himself about possibly staying here... permanently. He didn't know how he would be able to eat, or what his friends would think happened to him. All he knew was that life under the sea was much better than life on the surface.
“Hey Marty” Ariel said swimming over to him. She had become a part of Marty through the short time he had known her.
“Hi Ariel” “How was your dinner” He asked letting her know he didn't eat.
“Yeah I overheard, why didn't you eat?” She asked curiously.
“Um I'm Human, Remember?” Marty said sadly. He was absolutely sure that life under the sea was better.
“Whats wrong?” Ariel asked concerned. She had never seen Marty so down before.
“Nothing its just....” Marty trailed off unaware of how to approach the topic. 'She'll think I'm silly for wanting to be like her!' Marty thought to himself.
“Just what?” Ariel asked curiously. Her arms were intertwined behind her back and she just floated there in the water. Her red vibrant hair, flowing all over the place. She looked so innocent and sweet.
“I-I-I” Marty began. “I-I want to.... Become part of your world” Marty said sheepishly like a kid asking for something but knowing that his parents will say no.
“Why?” Ariel giggled. She had never thought of her world as wonderful in any way. Especially after she became human.
“Because... your world is so... Perfect. Everyone's friendly and happy, there's no fighting, fish can TALK” Marty said. He noticed Ariel sadden a little as he listed all the things wrong with his world.
“Whats wrong?” Marty asked concerned. Ariel was always the happiest person he'd ever met and seeing her sad hurt him.
“What? Oh, nothing” Ariel said sadly. She turned away from him unable to keep eye contact. She focused her eyes on the seafloor as they began to water.
“Ariel I may have only known you for one day, but I can tell your upset about something” Marty said in a warm comforting tone.
“I just... hate hearing about how bad your world is” Ariel said finally.
“What do you mean?” Marty asked surprised. The answer he got from her had caught him off guard as well as confused him.
“I used to be part of your world Marty” Ariel said sadly and softly.
“What? what do you mean?” Marty asked confused.
Ariel looked up at the surface and sighed to herself. She thought for a moment on how to start the story.
“Long ago when I was a teenager I used to be obsessed with the human world. One day I was in my secret grotto when I saw something overhead. I went to investigate and saw fireworks in the sky. At the time I had no idea what they were”
“Then what happened?” Marty asked softly. He was listening intently to her story which had griped his imagination.
“I went over to investigate and climbed up the side of the ship. I saw a bunch of humans having a birthday party for Prince Eric” Ariel said smiling at the memory of her first encounter with Eric.
“Who's Prince Eric?” Marty asked. He had never heard of anyone with that name in history class.
“He was my husband. When I first saw him I realized that I wanted to be with him for the rest of my life”. And so Ariel began to tell her story of how she went to the sea witch and traded her voice for legs, how she tried to get Eric to kiss her and how she thwarted the sea witches attempt to marry Eric. She told of how Eric saved her and her father and all of Atlantica.
“When my father aw how much we loved each other he decided to give me legs so I could be with him” Ariel said tears of joy forming at her eyes a she recalled the happy memory.
“Where is Eric?” Marty asked as she finished her story.
“He Died, a long time ago” Ariel said. Tears of sadness now covered her face.
“I'm sorry” Marty said.
“Don't be its not your fault” Ariel said with a smile through her tear stained face.
Sorry it took so long to be honest i really didnt want to do this however thankfully i am at the halfway point in the story it gets intresting after this so stay tuned and comment i already have ideas for new stories so im going to try and finish this quickly
|
|
|
Post by josh89 on Mar 24, 2011 22:36:17 GMT -5
love it ! please continue
|
|
|
Post by daytripper on Mar 27, 2011 21:19:06 GMT -5
i hate it when i only have one comment. please if you read my story and like it feel free to write a review it dosent take very long.
when there is only one comment it makes me feel like no one likes my story or is reading it. so also im working on the next chapter now shouldnt be too long
|
|
|
Post by Kimberly on Mar 27, 2011 21:30:21 GMT -5
was it old age? love your story, if you keep righting I'll keep reading.
|
|
|
Post by Ariel on Mar 27, 2011 21:51:23 GMT -5
Great Chapter I love it!
|
|
|
Post by daytripper on Mar 27, 2011 22:24:58 GMT -5
Yay with all the comments but seriously that makes me feel a lot better also almost done with the next chapter
|
|
|
Post by daytripper on Mar 27, 2011 22:47:30 GMT -5
Chapter 12
Shocking Revelation
Marty comforted Ariel for a minute or two before they both heard a coughing sound behind them. Startled the two jumped in surprise and turned around to see a red crab with his arms crossed staring at them.
“Hi Sebastian” Ariel said enthusiastic, putting on a happy face for her friend.
“Don't Hi me Ariel” Sebastian said sternly. “I know your friends little secret” He said pointing his claw at Marty. “And if da Sea King Finds out! He'll be furious!” Sebastian said waving his claws around through the air.
“W-what do you mean?” Ariel asked trying to laugh it off.
“I mean I saw him on da surface! And he took of his face! He's a human Ariel!” Sebastian said almost yelling. Sebastian was panting and fuming with anger.
“Sebastian I think your just a little mistaken” Ariel said calmly trying to salvage the situation. “Maybe there was a glare from the sun?” Ariel said smiling. While Ariel was calm, Marty was shaking in fear. He didn't know what would happen if the sea king found out but from the crabs reaction it couldn't be good.
“I know what I saw Ariel” Sebastian said firmly. He may be old but he was no fool. “If you know whats good for ya boy I suggest you leave” Sebastian said poking Marty in the chest.
“What if I AM human? Would you really tell on me?” Marty asked trying to be brave.
“No, I wouldn't but keep this in mind, the sea king ALWAYS finds out” Sebastian said in a serious tone. He kept eye contact with Marty the whole time.
“And Ariel, DON'T forget you have singing rehearsal tomorrow at noon” Sebastian said in an off note.
“I wont forget Sebastian” Ariel said with a smile.
“And as for you boy, let me give you a little bit of advice. Stay out of trouble and keep a low profile and you'll be fine” Sebastian said in a calmer tone than before.
“Thanks for the tip” Marty said with a smile. Sebastian gave him a half smile.
“Oh Ariel, I'm getting too old for dis. When are you going to settle down?” Sebastian asked.
“Sebastian I just don't think that ill ever settle down” Ariel said with a playful laugh.
“You might want to give it a try you know, it can be quit relaxing” He said with a chuckle.
“Not a chance Sebastian” Ariel said with a laugh.
“Well den I'd better be on my way” Sebastian said giving Marty a disapproving glance before swimming off.
“Bye Sebastian” Ariel said as he left.
Ariel gave a big sigh of relief as she sank down on Marty's sponge bed. It was obvious that she had been faking her good mood and happiness.
“What am I going to do?” Ariel said to herself. She lay on the bed shaking her head with her hands covering her face.
“Do about what?” Marty asked swimming over to Ariel.
“Sebastian is right, every time I hid something from my father he found out” Ariel said removing her hands from her face so she could look at Marty as he sat on the bed. She looked like she was in distress.
“Like what?” Marty asked trying to keep the green tailed mermaid talking.
“Like when I tried to keep a killer whale in my room for three months, or when I saved Eric from drowning, and who can forget my Grotto?” Ariel said lying on her back on the bed.
Marty sat down on the bed next to her and thought for a second. He knew the crab was just trying to scare them, and for some reason it worked with Ariel. But because he was human, a tiny little red crab getting in his face wasn't that intimidating. He had only appeared scared so the crab would think his plan worked.
“Don't listen to that fool Ariel, hes only trying to scare you” Marty said in a reassuring tone.
“I know but hes right” Ariel said. Marty sighed and thought for a moment. He wondered if he should try and change the subject to get Ariel's mind off of things.
“Say what did he mean you have a singing rehearsal tomorrow?” Marty asked. He guessed it wouldn't hurt to try and take her mind off what Sebastian had said.
“Me and my sisters sing for the kingdom” Ariel said with enthusiasm. She seemed to forget her previous dilemma and seemed eager to tell Marty about her singing.
“What do you sing?” Marty asked actually intrigued.
“Well usually I sing whatever Sebastian tells us to sing, he is the court composer after all” Ariel said.
“No, I mean what type of music do you sing? Rock, Pop, Classic?” Marty asked, he was guessing that since they were not that different from each other, then their music shouldn't be either. But judging from the look he was getting from Ariel, he was wrong.
“What do you mean?” Ariel asked confused.
“Never mind” Marty said with a sigh.
“Okay well, I'm going to be in my room” Ariel said getting up.
“Okay I'm Going to sleep for the night” Marty said with a yawn.
“Night” Ariel said.
“Good night Ariel” Marty said closing his eyes.
|
|
|
Post by josh89 on Mar 28, 2011 1:19:11 GMT -5
i liked this chapter alot !! thats the ariel i remember lol always playing coy with sebastian =D
|
|
|
Post by Ariel on Mar 28, 2011 20:01:13 GMT -5
Another wonderful chapter.I love sebastian
|
|
|
Post by Kimberly on Mar 31, 2011 21:00:27 GMT -5
good chapter, can't wait to see what happens next.
|
|
|
Post by daytripper on Mar 31, 2011 21:31:29 GMT -5
i like how you guys all have winner banners under your comments like most uniqe signature and stuff.
i was wondering. what about a best fanfiction writer banner? ; D could anyone make one?
|
|
|
Post by Kimberly on Apr 1, 2011 21:09:34 GMT -5
i like how you guys all have winner banners under your comments like most uniqe signature and stuff. i was wondering. what about a best fanfiction writer banner? ; D could anyone make one? those banners are from contests we had. if you would like to suggest a new contest PM jazzy. hope that helps, looking forward to reading more of your story.
|
|
|
Post by daytripper on Apr 1, 2011 22:57:07 GMT -5
is Jazzy ever online?
|
|
|
Post by Kimberly on Apr 2, 2011 17:26:32 GMT -5
is Jazzy ever online? she logs in and looks around like most of us you can pm her, littleariel, or Prince of Bubbles.
|
|
|
Post by daytripper on Apr 2, 2011 23:04:45 GMT -5
is Jazzy ever online? she logs in and looks around like most of us you can pm her, littleariel, or Prince of Bubbles. already pmed her BTW Little Ariel is NEVER online he hasent been since december!!! i wonder if she may have... lost intrest in the little mermaid (GASP)
|
|
|
Post by daytripper on Apr 3, 2011 18:25:07 GMT -5
Alright peeps, working on the next chapter now.
|
|
|
Post by daytripper on Apr 3, 2011 20:34:35 GMT -5
Chapter 13
Rehearsal
Marty awoke slowly next morning to glittering rays of light bouncing around on the sea floor.
“What a weird feeling living underwater” Marty said to himself as he stretched his arms and legs. He checked to make sure his mask was working correctly and didn't break in his sleep. Once he was done with that he slowly made his way out of the room. He peeked his head out into the hallway to be sure that no one was watching him before swimming out into the hall. He swam down the hallway searching each room for a sight of the red headed princess.
Marty made his way out of the palace and into the open ocean. He still saw no sign of her yet he continued to look. Suddenly though as he neared the grotto he heard a soft beautiful voice ring through the sea.
“What would I give, to live where you are. What would I pay, to stay here beside you. What would I do to see you, smiling at me? Where would we walk, where would we run, if we could stay all day in the sun! just you and me, and I could be, Part of your world”
Marty reached the entrance to the grotto just as the person inside finished singing. Marty looked inside of the grotto to find it empty.
“Hello?” Marty called. It was eerily quiet and Marty's voice bounced off the walls of the grotto. Marty failed to notice the red head floating quietly above him waiting to strike.
“HELLO MARTY” Ariel called leaping on top of Marty and scaring the crap out of him at the same time.
“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH” Marty yelled. He looked up only to be pranced upon by Ariel who was having a laughing fit.
Marty hit the seafloor with Ariel on top of him giggling.
“Ariel” Marty whined “Don't scare me like that!” He said feeling embarrassed that he had yelled so loud and the fact that she had scared him.
“I'm sorry Marty” Ariel said giggling.
“What are you doing here anyways? Don't you have something else to do?” Marty said with a raised eyebrow.
“Like what?” Ariel said clueless. Marty sighed and shook his head with disbelief.
“Oh I don't know? Perhaps Rehearsal?” Marty said calmly.
“Oh shoot! I forgot!” Ariel said smacking her head with her hand.
“You know if I were you I would make sure not to upset that red crustacean” Marty said remembering last nights encounter with Sebastian.
“Oh come on Marty, Sebastian is such a softy. He may seem tough, but he still loves me” Ariel said smiling.
“Yeah, whatever” Marty said examining the books that lines one of the “shelves” of the grotto.
“Hey” Marty said to himself picking up a book from the selection. “I've read this book” Marty said to himself and Ariel.
“Which one?” Ariel asked swimming over to him.
“Of Mice And Men” Marty said slowly turning the book around to examine its features. “But, how did you get it?” Marty asked “Its relatively new” Marty said.
“What do you mean, Relatively new?” Ariel asked confused.
“Well considering how long you've supposedly lived for, it was published in 1937 almost 90 years ago” Marty said opening the book.
“I just found it one day” Ariel said shrugging her shoulders.
“Did you read it? Er I mean Can you read it?” Marty asked. He had no idea if she could read, and if she could read he had no idea if she could understand new literature.
“Yes I can read thank you” Ariel said giving him a weird look. “And yes I have read it” Ariel said.
“Well? What did you think of it?” Marty asked eager to know what she thought of the story.
“It was very... sad” Ariel said remembering the ending. “He didn't deserve that” She said unhappily.
“I know but when you think about though it was the best, I mean everyone else was going to hang him! At least the other way was quicker. But still he must have felt bad about what he did to Lenny” Marty said. The book made him sad there was no doubt about it.
“I guess your right” Ariel said sadly. Marty put the book back where it was about turned to Ariel.
“Come on Ariel lets get to rehearsal” He said swimming off to the exit. Ariel giggled and followed him.
“Your very slow you know that?” Ariel asked as they swam back to the palace.
“Yeah I know” Marty said unhappily. He wished he had a tail like Ariel, he wished he could breathe underwater, he wished that he could live under the sea without gear.
They arrived at the rehearsal not a moment too soon. Sebastian was getting ready to start but had not yet noticed Ariel was gone. Swimming quickly over to her seat she sat down right as the crab walked in. He was very surprised to find Ariel actually there ON TIME for once. He took note of the fact and continued on.
“Lets get started now then shall we? We must be ready for your fathers party tomorrow so were not going to stop until we get this right” Sebastian said with a certain authority that is earned not learned.
Marty watched the lessons from hall out of Sebastian's sight but with a perfect view of Ariel. No sooner had they gotten started that Flounder showed up and joined Marty in the hall.
“Hey!” the little yellow fish said. Marty chuckled.
“Hey there” He said rubbing the fish on the head. Marty Liked Flounder, He was very fun to be around and even though he didn't admit it, he liked humans.
“What are you doing here Marty?” Flounder asked. Wagging his little tail excitedly.
“I'm Listening to Ariel rehearse” Marty said tickling the fishes belly causing him to erupt into a fit of laughter.
“Why are YOU here?” Marty asked the little fish.
“I always listen to Ariel sing” Flounder said happily.
As they continued to talk they could hear Ariel and her sisters start to sing in perfect harmony. They were so good that Marty began to fall asleep. HE could hear Flounder hum along with the tune they were singing as he drifted off into sleep.
PLEASE COMMENT IF YOU READ IT!!!!!
|
|